21 things I learned from being 21

Twenty-one has been an crazy, amazing, terrifying, educational, and fulfilling year. I’ve laughed and I’ve cried. I’ve gained friends and I’ve lost friends. I’ve changed and I’ve remained the same. I’ve grown up and yet parts of me remain like a child. I’ve made a plethora of mistakes and I’ve learned more about myself and life than I ever thought possible. So in no particular order here are some of the things I have learned over the past year.

Lesson One: People change. Plain and simple. Just because you knew someone inside and out two years ago does not mean you know who they are now. Give these people the benefit of the doubt. They may be ingrained in your head as one type of person because that’s how you left them. But if you think about how much you yourself have changed and grown, let your heart allow them to as well.

Lesson Two: Learn to say you’re sorry. And really mean it. I am the worst when it comes to apologizing. Either it’s because I think people already know that I am sorry or the words are just to hard for me to say. No matter the reason these words are something we must learn to say and say them often.

Sometimes others need to hear these words just as badly as they need to hear the words ‘I love you’. Don’t let fear, pride, or ignorance hold you back from rescuing a relationship. Learn to say “I’m sorry”.

Lesson Three: Waste your time wisely. Time is valuable and yet each day we take it for granted. Do things with purpose. Make time for friends. Make time for family. Make time for yourself (I’m still trying to learn how to do this one). Not every day needs to be the most life altering or legendary day ever, but it should have purpose. The older you get the faster time goes so take it all in and capture every minute.

Lesson Four: Red cups really do bring joy. Be sure to thank your local Starbucks barista this Holiday season.

Lesson Five: It’s okay to not have it all figured out. It’s okay to still be unsure of what you believe. The twenty’s are all about discovering who you are, making mistakes, falling on your face and having the strength to pick yourself back up. Allow yourself to make the wrong decision and then learn from it. Study. Investigate. Establish who you are and what you believe, but don’t feel like you have to do that all at once.

Lesson Six: Sports and athletic recreational activities are NOT for everyone. And that’s okay.

Lesson Seven. Forgiving and forgetting is hard. Let’s state the obvious here. We are not God. Unfortunately we don’t have the ability to just erase the hurt someone caused us. We don’t have the capacity to ignore the words or actions of someone else that cuts us. But we do have the capability to forgive. So go on a walk, talk to the skies, free your heart, and forgive.

Lesson Eight: It’s perfectly fine to not be good at something. Like bowling for instance.

Lesson Nine: Don’t take your family for granted. They are the only ones who have been by your side since day one. They are the only ones who have put up with your temper tantrums, teenage mood swings and sad choices in boyfriends. They are the only ones who have gone to every rainy game and every show or concert. They are the only ones who understand and enjoy your holiday traditions. Don’t let time or distance separate you from the people who will always love you AND like you. The Avett Brothers said it best. There is nothing worth sharing like the love that lets you share your name.

Lesson Ten: It’s not bad to be in love. Just because you’re young doesn’t mean your naive to love someone and God forbid want to get married. It’s okay to be single. It’s okay to be dating. And guess what. It’s also okay to be married.

Lesson Eleven: The letters on your sweatshirt don’t matter in the real world. They do not define you. And they mean squat on a resume.

Lesson Twelve: Some days just suck. Netflix binges and hot tea are great remedies for these kind of days.

Lesson Thirteen: Take chances and opportunities that open up to you. There is always a reason for the doors that open and the doors that close. Even if it doesn’t make sense, take the risk and say yes. Some of the best things that have happened for me this year were things I originally never thought I wanted. Sometimes the big guy upstairs really does know better than us. Trust him and walk through that door ready for anything.

Lesson Fourteen: Stop complaining. It’s draining and annoying and nobody wants to hear it.

Lesson Fifteen: It’s time to forgive that person who “ruined” your life when you were fifteen. Sometimes we let things that happen to us or something someone says when we’re young, shape the way we view certain people or things. But there has to come a time when you just let it go. Carrying bitterness in your heart for six, seven, or even eight years does nothing for your health. And they certainly (probably) don’t know, remember, or even care. So why should you?

Lesson Sixteen: People aren’t always going to be right about other people. Don’t let a reputation or what other people have to say about someone determine your opinion of a person. Give everyone a fair shot. Who knows. You may just fall in love and prove everyone all wrong.

Lesson Seventeen: Some people might not like you. And that’s 100% okay. Cause you’re not going to like everyone out there either.

Lesson Eighteen: It’s okay to grow up. It’s okay to not have the same best friend you did when you were twelve. That doesn’t mean that friendship wasn’t real or that you didn’t mean any of the promises you made. Like I said in lesson one; people grow up and people change. Our personalities change, our plans alter, our goals in life don’t match the eleven year old version of ourselves. Sometimes we drift apart and that can suck, but the joy and the memories will always be there.

Lesson Nineteen: Snapchat your sisters. This can lead to really fun nights when you’re alone in your apartment and will always make them feel better. Or that you care. Because you do. More than they will ever realize.

Lesson Twenty: Don’t be afraid to just say what’s on your mind. Filters are good, but it’s also important to be able to speak your mind. When someone asks you what you want, tell them. When someone wants to know what’s wrong, just tell them. Keeping in your emotions and words is never good. It almost always leads to a volcanic explosion of tears and broken sentences and total confusion. So just SAY IT. (For the record I still suck at this and am working on it. I promise!)

Lesson Twenty-One: It’s going to be okay. Life goes on. Life gets better. To live is an awfully big adventure.

#lifelessons #forgiveness #love #learning #honesty #compassion #mutterings